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Hi, my name is Richele McFarlin. I reside in Ohio with my family. I am a homeschooling mom to my three precious children. I am a proud wife of ten years to my husband Phil. We met in college where we both majored in Psychology. Our family is centered around the Lord Jesus Christ. My husband and I gratefully serve the Lord at our local church. Our ministries include AWANA, junior church, and In-Touch small group meetings to name a few. I am thankful to have the opportunity to further serve the Lord through Wives of Faith. My goal is to help wives build blessed Godly relationships with their husbands.

Richele also writes a monthly parenting column for our sister site Moms of Faith. Click Here to read it.

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Leah and Rachel: Sisters in Peril

These sisters and their struggles have much to teach us about being a wife. I want to first explore each woman and her struggle separately and then conclude with how the Lord has used these two women to teach a lesson I did not anticipate.

Let’s take our first look at Leah. I think it is important to point out that her name means weary. Leah was not a chosen wife but one thrust upon her husband out of trickery. In those times, it was proper for the older daughter to marry before the younger. However, in this case the groom preferred the younger daughter. As a result, Leah felt unloved. She spent her entire marriage trying to get her husband to love her. Her firstborn was named Reuben which means “the Lord has seen my affliction”. She believed that the Lord had provided her a son so her husband would finally love her. She was wrong. As we see today having a child does not heal a marriage. I suppose the idea that women will do anything to gain the love of a man goes way back! Poor Leah, tried so hard to gain the love she was missing by continuing to provide sons for her husband. She was never successful in her quest for love. She was a faithful woman who prayed to God and leaned on him for answers. Yet even that did not change her pain or her situation. She had the love of the Lord and that was the only love that she could ever need. She didn’t know it then but God did have a reason for her to be in this marriage. She did serve a purpose through her pain. Leah is the mother of Judah which in turn makes her the ancestral mother of the Davidic line which is the line of Christ. God proves to us that despite the agendas of man or woman his will will be done. This also teaches that we may not see the purpose in our struggles but we still need to trust in the Lord’s plan.

Rachel, on the other hand, is the beautiful woman whom Jacob truly loves. Due to her father’s plot, Rachel is denied Jacob only to later share him with her sister. One would think as difficult as that would be that Rachel would be happy in her marriage. What woman would not be honored and blessed to have a man that loves her as much as Jacob loved Rachel? However, Rachel had a problem that colored everything. Was her problem that she was barren? No, that did not have to disrupt the romance between husband and wife. It was that she was jealous of her sister. Rachel may have had the love of Jacob but Leah had his sons. The green eyed monster of jealousy began to rear its ugly head and consume Rachel. This beauty would soon turn into a beast. Leah was not immune to this contest as she revealed in her ability to provide sons for Jacob. Leah was so jealous of her sister having Jacob’s love that she threw Rachel’s barrenness in her face. Rachel was seeing so much green that she lost her way and forgot about the Lord. She went to Jacob and demanded that he provide her a son. How often do we make irrational demands based solely in our own insecurity? Jacob was not to blame for her inability to conceive a child. Yet, forgetting her duty to submit and respect her husband she blamed him. A frustrated Jacob responds in anger and tells her that he cannot change the will of God. Now, when was the last time the will of God stopped a determined woman from at least trying to do what she thought was best? Rachel was surely not taking no as an answer. She didn’t turn to the Lord. She had a better idea. Rachel tired to circumvent the Lord by having her maidservant have a son in her place. Poor Rachel, was she surprised to learn that going outside the will of God afforded her nothing? Leah matched and beat Rachel at every turn in the area of maternity. Rachel was so jealous and obsessed with HER goal that she fell away from the Lord and discounted the love of her husband.

Leah and Rachel were so involved in their own quest and jealous contest that each failed to see the love in front of them. Rachel had the love of Jacob. Leah had the love of the Lord. Each could have had love for one another. The sisters could have joined together for support instead of tearing each other down. In the midst of all this both suffered in their marriage. Each allowed their own agenda and suffering to be a shadow over their duty as wives and women of faith.

One last point I wanted to make is another aspect that Lord has taught me concerning these two women. Leah was not the intended wife, yet she was ever present and impacted the relationship of the intended wife. Jacob would never say he loved Leah yet he was powerless to give her up. She also provided him with something he needed, his sons. Are you sharing your husband with another? Is your Leah in the form of his family, his friends, sports, his job, an addiction, or video games? It could be that you are currently involved in a struggle so intensely that you are loosing sight of what you are fighting for. Do you feel your husband has a need being provided for by another source? Maybe you are both Leah and Rachel fighting against yourself. If you feel you were not who your husband intended to marry you may fight against yourself to the point that you can’t see the love in front of you. Are you the woman spoke of in Proverbs who tears down her house with her own hands? Whatever the case maybe Leah and Rachel proved one thing. They proved that this battle has no victor. They showed us how we can easily get so caught up in our own insecurity that we loose sight of what is important. When struggles come, and they will, we need to cling to the Lord for guidance. It can be tempting when you want something so badly to circumvent the Lord to achieve your purpose. We never allow ourselves the reality that we are making the decision to go outside His will yet we do. You see, during times of struggle we become impatient and self centered. The Lord is interested in the success of our marriages. He is the only one who can change hearts and heal the wounded. Let’s not fight battles where no one wins and everyone looses. Turn to the Lord and be patient and trust that he does have a plan for your life and your marriage.

Leah and Rachel: Sisters in Peril

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